it hasn't hit me yet. what i am about to do. leave my stable, happy life for something totally unknown. moving to africa. all the poetic words come to me in that state between sleeping and waking. not 10 minutes ago, i was lying on my thermarest writing a bestseller in my head. and now. wordless.
i often wonder why i am moving to africa. why that continent fascinates me. there is need everywhere in the world. lennie, a 40 year alcoholic living on the streets of calgary, needs someone. new sudanese immigrants trying to navigate canada need someone. paralyzed patients in the foothills hospital need someone. but i have a sneaking suspicion it is not me that they need. someone else needs me, and they don't live here.
running into the pain. this phrase has been on a loop in my head for months now. i don't know where it came from. maybe i stole it from someone else's blog. running into the pain. that is what i feel like i have to do. not that i will not also experience great joy, but i feel i must share the immense burden of pain that my african sisters and brothers are bearing. i must share in their suffering, but find hope as i offer to share the yoke.
it hasn't hit me yet. what i am about to do. sharing words and cups of coffee with friends across the country has not felt like goodbye. i laugh, i tell stories like nothing has changed. then give a quick hug and say "see ya later." i don't like goodbye. i prefer till we meet again. two years is long. two years is short. it hasn't hit me yet.
i have about 20 cards in my carry on suitcase from people who think i am nice and brave and loving and kind and courageous. is this the same alida i know? why i am so blessed to be in the company of so many people who like me and love me, i do not know. it hasn't hit me yet.
2200 is my departure time. i will step on a plane and defy gravity as it hurtles at 900km/hr to my new home. i think, amongst the quiet clouds, it will hit me.
7 comments:
Best wishes Alida - I have always admired your courage and willingness to step out of your comfort zone, and your incredible desire to help others. I look forward to keeping track of what you're up to through your blog!
What an adventure you are embarking on today! I pray that you travel well and you and your luggage arrive together and safely. I hope to see you next week!
And if you are like me, it will take much longer for the gravity of moving to Africa to hit you than just the flight over. I think a part of me is still dreaming.
hello.
Your post resonates with me only because I found you through Amy Thompson's blog which I found through the CRWRC website.
I go to the Kings University College in Edmonton. Harry Fernhout is the president of it. Are you related?
I leave in less than 2 weeks for Kenya where I will be doing an internship in development. I'll be in Kisumu, south-western Kenya. Where will you be? My blog will be a Kenya one soon too.
I hope your travels go well!
Peace and Blessings!
You are an amazing woman. You were the one who inspired me to go to West Africa for 4 months earlier this year. I agree with you that the African people touch us in a way that a small part of our heart stays there and then we long to return even though we are living in a stable and safe place called home. I will continue to pray for your courage, strength, and patience and look forward to following your blog. Take care and Keep safe.
Nancy
All the best to you in Kenya, Alida. I've run out of fingers and toes trying to count the number of overseas trips you've made in the six years I've known you :) Africa has been so often ignored by the world, witness Rwanda, Darfur and the AIDS epidemic, to name just a few. I'm grateful for people like you who are actively trying to improve the lives of people in Africa. Don't underestimate the value of your efforts! Take care and I look forward to reading your blog (and BTW, thanks for the info you sent me re: Philippines not long ago).
Alida, we just got back from vacation,(not Whisler, just Nanaimo) so sorry for missing your send off. We want to wish you all the blessings God will give, and if you cannot hold them all, give them away! so that you will bless the wonderful people in and around Plateau. Your blessings in turn will be multiplied. Please greet Elizabeth, Jairus and the others. We pray daily for them and you.
Henry and Susan
We are meeting as a Kenya Committee tonight to decide on funding for varius projects, including Plateau hospital and the mobile clinic. You will hear soon i think. Enjoy the cicada's
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